Alex Mann
@alexjmannSometimes I hold the door for people just to watch them run.
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Hi, you can find me: 🎬 writing + directing movies, tv and shorts: alexjmann.com ⚡️ taking neon photos: instagram.com/alexjmann That's all I've got right now. What else do you want from me?
Humans have been evolving for millions of years yet we still don't know what to do with our faces when people are singing us happy birthday.
Losing viewers on each subsequent Instagram story is like my little own personal stock market crash.
There are only two names for other drivers on the road – “lady” and “buddy.” That’s it.
Any text that starts with “soooo” has a 50% chance of ruining your life.
People with goatees should be required to wear masks even after the pandemic.
If you’re already debating whether to go as Joe Exotic or the Coronavirus for Halloween... just stop. The answer is both.
It's gotten to the point where putting on jeans feels like you're wearing a tux.
Nothing makes me more uncomfortable than someone who bowls with perfect form.
I’d rather stand in the bathroom for an hour than ask how your shower works.
I accidentally used the words "lifestyle" and "journey" in the same sentence and now I'm a cult leader.
You can't just "like" lizards. You're either deathly afraid or you keep one in your pocket.
People react to avocado toast like they just learned they inherited a billion dollar fortune.
I accidentally said the word “adventurous” to someone and now we’re on a first date.
I open packages from Amazon like it’s the first time I’ve ever opened something.
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