Never trust someone who uses the praying hands emoji
Why tf raising canes gotta be closed on Sunday’s I just want my post midnight chicken tenders
People who answer “yes” to either or questions need to humble themselves.
Im not meant to work a 9-5, I’m meant to be pretty and smoke weed.
cats always look like they're "not mad just disappointed"
Ppl who bring just a towel to the beach are better than ppl who bring a tent and chairs
I don’t get why mom always wants to clean the house before the cleaning people arrive
yo mr white- [BONG SHATTER] [SCREAM]
I bet Elon musk is getting some big fomo about Jeff Bezos going to space before him
I’m too handsome to “read books”
I wonder whatever happened to Aiden from middle school
You’re food is bad and you should feel bad
*stares at the menu for 12 minutes* *orders the same sub you’ve been getting since grade school*
I can’t be the only one that saw this coming right?
look how happy tom holland and zendaya are im gonna combust
Russian is basically drunk English and Polish is drunk Russian. All the Scandinavian languages copied each others homework. Portuguese is spicy Spanish. German is English with anger issues. French thinks it’s better than everyone else. Italian is a better dressed Spanish.
Shower thought: boneless wings are just closeted chicken nuggets
The saying “stay positive” has a much different meaning in the medical world 🤔🤔
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