@mmillbauer Profile picture

Mya 🙉

@mmillbauer

Joined January 2019
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Nobody: Not one person: Not a single soul: My brother: "CAROLE BASKIN!!"


Petition: The first thing we do after we get the Coronavirus under control is bring back the Harlem Shake


You ever feel like there isn't a whole lot in your life that makes you look forward to the next day? Like, if you didnt wake up tomorrow you wouldn't be missing much? Like, you kind of just feel empty?


When one of your coworkers asks you out of nowhere if you're gonna be his wife someday


Might get a new car tomorrowwwwww


Nobody: My brother: This game is such fucking retard


Apparently, as a woman, your breasts stop growing around age 21. Well if that's true, I've got a year and a half to get my big girl boobs or I want my money back 😠


I forgot that second 'you' after 'mean' but I bet your brain didn't even notice

What do you mean got fired from Mary K?

mmillbauer's tweet image. What do you mean got fired from Mary K?


What do you mean got fired from Mary K?

mmillbauer's tweet image. What do you mean got fired from Mary K?

Daylight savings crept up on me, like damn.


Saturday nights are dry asf lately


Fucking done with people underestimating me


As soon as I fold the rest of my laundry, it's over for you bitches


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