laureljan's profile picture. I arrange flowers and books for money, make comics, talk mad shit constantly

🌼 laurel 🌼

@laureljan

I arrange flowers and books for money, make comics, talk mad shit constantly

Joined November 2011
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i was feeling deeply moved after finishing a book but then a mosquito bit my ass and now I’m just pissed


There’s no way to know without increasing the sample size

if the shooter were not male, white/white passing, and conventionally attractive, would the response from the internet be the same? genuine question bc at this point it feels like a lot of the idolisation that luigi mangione gets is not driven by class consciousness or ideology



Called my dentist and the lady apologized that she was having trouble understanding my accent, which is like what do you mean. I grew up in California. Do I not just sound like TV to kiwis


first thing this video made you think of is your mother and killing yourself huh

Imagine if there was a video of your mother behaving like this, absolute suicide fuel for the next generation:



catching up on nz politics since I’ve been away for 12 years and this luxon guy sucks ass who is this clown


had big productive plans but then I woke up hungover so it’s gonna be 4 hours of slay the spire


really cool that the stupidest people in the world have become obsessed with raw milk right when bird flu is showing transmission to cows. I’m sure that’ll be fine


this was complete ass but I still love u ridley

‘GLADIATOR II’ opens with $87M at the international box office. The biggest overseas start for a Ridley Scott-directed film.

FilmUpdates's tweet image. ‘GLADIATOR II’ opens with $87M at the international box office.

The biggest overseas start for a Ridley Scott-directed film.


my dad got a robot vacuum and he is so smitten. her name is bjork and he is making sure she is safe while she maps all the rooms


fukked up

'Scavengers Reign' co-creator Joe Bennett has confirmed on Instagram that Netflix will not be renewing the series for a second season. He posted a teaser produced at Green Street Pictures showing what was to come in season 2 if the show had been able to continue.



my mum’s in Germany and says everyone has schnoxies (schnauzer/dachshunds) which I’ve never seen before. feels like more of an affront to God than other designer mixes

laureljan's tweet image. my mum’s in Germany and says everyone has schnoxies (schnauzer/dachshunds) which I’ve never seen before. feels like more of an affront to God than other designer mixes

coworker is teaching me about the lotto. I thought you just picked numbers but boy was I wrong


mom can you pick me up they’re playing the killers at this emo nite


This is a great thread about how to see all the frames in a film and still somehow not have watched it at all

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sister is living with me til January, and I forgot how much I love having a younger sibling. Can’t find my perfume because she took it, can’t find my charger because she took it, can’t find my sweaters or hats or snacks because she took them. it’s been so long ❤️


I love porn spam man. What did she mean by this

My race and gender changes depending on whether I've been eaten out or not



forgot that you aren’t meant to eat a whole bag of sugar-free candy at once. I will be paying for this with my life it seems


me n the girls neural coupling

laureljan's tweet image. me n the girls neural coupling

trying a new morning routine (coffee and 3 hours of balatro)


and he was right

Remember when Rick Riordan convinced a generation of ADHD children that they were born for melee combat



Reading The Great Gatsby but shaking my head the whole time so everyone knows I disagree with Gatsby

We need to stop YA authors

TheEpicDept's tweet image. We need to stop YA authors
TheEpicDept's tweet image. We need to stop YA authors


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