@kellyccooper Profile picture

kelly cooper

@kellyccooper

🌝 brooklyn comedy 🌝 @ladieswhoranch 🌝 watch "Message in a Bottle" on @adultswim SMALLS and @hbomax+ The Duchess of Nothing: https://t.co/NV8BrhAEBH

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Holding court at the party asking everyone their favorite fat bastard quote


I actually think it was the giant pimple on my chin that lost us the election


i know it doesnt matter but i feel like pee tapes could be the teensiest lil fun thing... like imagine waking up on a tuesday in 2027, abortion is illegal, trump and elon are a two-headed autocrat, the bible is science, and the pee tape comes up on your NYTimes alerts


lets storm the capital but be brat summer about it


I have always loved being a kelly cooper but now not so much

Kelly Cooper is a fantastic America First Candidate running to represent the Great People of Arizona’s 4th Congressional District!   Kelly will be an INCREDIBLE Fighter in Congress. A U.S. Marine Corps Veteran, Kelly knows how to Strengthen our Military, Care for our Veterans,…



I love jazz. The drum in bed with the piano. The trumpet fingering the bass. It’s so beautiful


Really dreading this election day. On the bright side my boyfriend ordered a foot massager that should be arriving any day now


There is nothing more life affirming then spending a shit ton of money on things I dont need and frankly don’t want very much


The car rental place I am at ran out of cars. This is like an airport running out of planes


do we think ice cream and enchiladas will make my stomach ache better or amazingly better


kelly cooper Reposted

i'm so happy that Dame Maggie Smith lived to see Eric Adams get indicted


kelly cooper Reposted

one of the best bits i've ever seen a mayor do. just completely ridiculous every time. the one with a croatia soccer jersey really is top notch.

From Gothamist

I want to do event horizon but for heaven


Sinking my sick little teeth into the new season of alone and I already know I have been to a jam band festival with at least one of the guys


these are all types of hair straighteners

What Playstation console did you start on?

Tweet Image 1


upstairs neighbor is having olympic village level speed sex above my desk. i hope he is hydrated


sarah jessica parking lot


The bus smells like cheese and not in a charcuterie sort of way


kelly cooper Reposted

I don’t know how Noah’s brain works but I’m glad it does

A key point missing in a lot of post debate analysis is that Trump’s claim about immigrants eating pets almost perfectly syncs up to the piano in the Peanuts theme song.



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