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Always blow a kiss to the big semis that switch lanes for you when you’re merging on <3
They could’ve thought of a better name for anteater just sayin
well well well, if it isn’t the bridge i said i’d cross when i came to it
How come my deodorant sweats even tho it says antiperspirant 😵💫
Im never lonely cuz i got these little guys with me :)
*$1400 Stimmy Hit* Me : Can I Have A Oreo McFlurry Mcdonald's: The Machine Is Down Me : Ii How Much It Cost To Fix It
every day I wake up and say “I’m tired of this grandpa” and every day the universe says “that’s too damn bad”
Taking a shower just for the hell of it. Not even dirty just like the vibes in there
When T-Pain said you rollin shawty let’s hit McDonald’s... brilliant
HATE when i’m saying something serious and i accidentally rhyme. i am not the lorax!!!!!!
How the frick do you go to bed accepting the fact that you’re gonna die someday
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