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Apparently they just wanted us to buy the app. Which I'm doing right now
Guys how long have you been able to play pac-man on Google maps!!? #thisisfuckingawesome
@thedailykirk hahaha! I only check it when I know you're talking about me
Does anyone else wish they'd make another gremlins movie? #gizmoforever #dontfeedthemaftermidnight #dotheygobydaylightsavings?
I think I need this “@BuzzFeed: The New “Drizzy” App Lets You Text Using Only Drake Lyrics bzfd.it/1F4xouC http://t.co/m5G2FO6SQp”
The biggest difference between a 9 and 10:30am call to jury duty is the shower🚿#maybetodaysomeonewillsitnexttome #america
It's getting up to 52 today. I can't wait to see how many dudes are wearing shorts #itsstillwinterasshole
This makes me feel even better about being a dropout “@birbigs: Some of our dumbest Americans are in college.”
This guy was better than us “@Esquiremag: Sam Simon, co-creator of @TheSimpsons, dead at 59: esqm.ag/6012FUEG http://t.co/bFqwfQCF15”
Is there seriously a tour of the courthouse right now? #whoarethesepeple
Nothing like a family vacation to make you lose your appetite #sheddingthewinterpounds
Instead of having a bad date or a fight with a boyfriend, I'm having Thai takeout and watching Bevis&Butthead do America #happyvalentines 💋
The wind is so cold I got brainfreeze from breathing #nywinter #whythefuckisitsocold
I'm at that time in my day where I'm making coffee and realizing I had a sex dream about Dustin Hoffman #someonepleaseexplain
I'd go to the gym to work out. But there they may judge the fact that I have a clay mask on my face and am eating twizzlers while squatting.
Come out Monday for our first 'Hot Date' of 2015! We've got a great lineup and snacks! #freecomedy #hotdatecomedy http://t.co/Yq7GmHTybt
Today I stepped over a frozen dead rat on the sidewalk. It's good to be home.
He said I have better hair than an Olsen😢“@nytimesarts: Taylor Negron, of ‘Fast Times at Ridgemont High,’ Dies at 57 nyti.ms/14MUzL6”
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