Jared Silvia
@jaredsilviaMakes things up but doesn’t lie. Runs @circuitchurch. Electronic music. Art.
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10 years ago today, I uploaded 'late for meeting,' still the most popular thing I've made I am so proud that it's an original independent work that earned over 100m views. The success allowed us to begin the 3rd film in 2014, take more chances. Prod went from 1 year to 3 years..
Why would anyone go to a ghost breeder when there are so many perfectly good ghosts that need a home already at the shelter.
First time Harley owners calling cars “cages” until someone changes lanes without signaling and nearly wipes them off the planet and then they’re like “fuck fuck fuck please can I trade back for my Honda civic omg fuck.”
As a medical doctor and a Juggalo, my work life can sometimes get very complicated!
I want my cat to know how genuinely pleased I am to see him, but I’m worried he now only recognizes his name when delivered in a squeaky cartoon voice. Difficult to replicate in an emergency situation.
Burger King has a “friend going through a rough divorce” vibe.
The last living fly in my kitchen seems lonely after what happened.
6 months since you really got going on that New Year’s resolution. I assume it’s going very well.
I looked up one thing about Ye and now I’m getting all these ads for discount plus size clothing. No, not writing a weird and insensitive joke, literally telling you what is going on in my life, and I hope you’re doing good, too.
Whenever I see an empty police vehicle by the road, I assume it has been left there not to deter speeders but because the officer who was driving it had a sudden and urgent realization that they could no longer continue their job, so they pulled over, got out, and walked away.
Once, my asthma doc told me most people get enough probiotics from cheese, yogurt, and ice cream, and i was like woah woah woah woah, hold up, because yes, I can absolutely commit to that gut-healthy diet. It’s just science, friends.
Hi @cvspharmacy can you explain why your pharmacy in Florida refused to fill this prescription for misoprostol?
If you're angry that I gave a giant asshole $8 so I could get an "edit tweet" button, holy shit are you going to be furious when you find out where the fossil fuels that heat my house come from. Shopping your way out of monopoly capitalism is a fool's errand. You are not an…
Every day my cat looks at himself and says, “Oh my god, I’m gorgeous! Why is no one offering me attention? This is a crime!” Then he trots over to me and says, “Hay! Asshole! I’m gorgeous!! Do something about it!” It sounds like this: “Maw! Meaw! Ma!” (Scratching my office chair)
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