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Paul Reposted
Cop: Do you have any drugs or weapons in your car? Me: Weapons. Yes. *flexes* Cop: ... Me: .... Cop: Step out of the car.
Paul Reposted
You’ll end up real disappointed if you think people will do for you as you do for them. Not everyone has the same fucking heart as you.
Paul Reposted
Relationship status: sleeping in my bed diagonally.
Paul Reposted
Laughing at your own texts before you send them because you’re so damn funny.
That time when your friends new at twitter and doesn't know at all wat she's doing lol haha
Geting thousands of notifications and wondering when the phone will explode 💢💥 @monkeyleg01
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