Elmo21
@elmo95692137889🦁Takes Survivor/GOT/HP/LOTR absurdly seriously⚡️/Billy Bonka’s the Name/here for a good time, Not A Short Time 🕰️ maybe the least funny and least sexy person?
“I’m not here because I’m an addict, I’m here because I have superpowers.” -Me, spoken recently to a peer in rehab with the most chalant sincerity (on second thought, rehab is a silly place)
You can’t resist Bazinga Jones. You really expect to accomplish that feat now that we’re knuckles deep into No-Nut-November?? Do not resist civilian!
Tom Holland, Zendaya, Anne Hathaway, Lupita N’Yongo, and Babu Frik to star in Christopher Nolan’s film set around the Rams victory over the Bengals in Super Bowl LVI, The Hollywood Reporter reports. Lupita’s transformation into disgusting white quarterback Jared Goff is maj sexy.
Today I had to explain to a room full of a dozen guys in their 20s who John Williams is. I now understand why somebody went off and coined the term ‘bloke’ (behind my back???).
Congrats to the burrito from Goblet of Fire for being pegged for double duty as host and musical guest on this week’s #SNL
💰Familial reminder that my tips are wide open now mainly for if you have ideas on how to elevate my Monkeyball game, but also of course yes as well too hey ya even cryptomoolah & it’s senile grandpa, cash.💸
“Now if you two don’t mind, I’m going to bed before either of you come up with another clever idea to get us killed-or worse, cucked.” -Hermione Danger Granger
“Paninis are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic. Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it.”-Albus Dumbledore
“I shall never reveal the best of you Severus”-said Dumbledore after Snape revealed that he makes the sickest paninis.
On my Happy Days rewatch and one of the main characters (El Funzõ) just jumped over a fr*king shark in water skis, damn this show is good. Just when I think it can’t get any better, they elevate like Drake on Scorpion. It’s on Tubi n***a go watch it like wrists. #JumpedTheShark🦈
Honestly my sweet Bridgitte, it is too early NOT to watch Phantom Thread.
Racial Draft Update Via Woj: The Whites would like to trade Jesus back to The Blacks for Kobe Bryant and lottery pick (21st century black-girl-yet-to-be-adopted that is born into poverty in either Detroit, Chicago or Atlanta aka The Prophet and daughter of The Chosen One aka me).
It just hit me that I’m gonna know Peggy Sommerville and Forest Isbell literally forever. I love moments like this AAHHHHHHH!!!!! #HarryPotter
#ChiefsKingdom don’t dominate teams; this year we just dominate the league. A chokehold on the war, but each battle tight. 1 tiny touchdown a game….and okay yes fine whatever, I will admit the refs have been chill with it this season🙄. @getnickwright @colincowherd @TheHerd #NFL
1. Gender’s a Vibe. Giving power to terms like Man & Woman beyond just what’s on ur body and what ur body does is good & giving more power to gender roles & separation of femininity & masculinity is necessary. 2. Aborted babies aren’t lil bodies they’re no more than an appendix.
Me: *Says nothing, pausing from big AA speech to serve some fierce side-eye to the ever-burgeoning in adipose cutesome cub with a spotty attendance record who just so happened to show up on my big day to reawaken feelings like I had for young Nigel Wolpert.* Me: “But I digress.”
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