@derek_beattie Profile picture

Derk

@derek_beattie

I mainly use Twitter to disagree with Teddy.

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Do Andrew and Matthew give off the same vibes?


Eagles Twitter better stfu about howie now


My wife watches the worst shows to fall asleep. Trying to sleep and bam.. George gets hit by a bus.. or Dan kills Keith. #greys #OTH


You talk a lot of shit about wordle for someone who lost his streak a week ago. #subtweet #ImTalkingAboutTeddy


Note to self: before next Black Friday unsubscribe to all crap emails.. #constantemails


While talking to @PatMcAfeeShow and @OfficialAJHawk Aaron Rodgers said “I don’t give a sh!t about either of them” #contextmatters


You can respond to any text message with the title of a Toby Keith song. #facts


Morning people irritate the crap out of me


It’s pretty simple. Get on board or get out of the way. You’re the problem.


I’m not calling you tiger


Megan doesn’t know the difference between golf and gulf


How the fuck is Christmas in 24 days?


I have never been more irritated watching wheel of fortune in my life..


I won’t know how I feel about the game till rodgers tells me on @PatMcAfeeShow on Tuesday.


I’m not playing with anyone dumb enough to accept an IBM Watson recommended trade.


Nothing will inspire people to question their beliefs more than their neighbor putting the recycling bin out on the wrong week. #StillGotCardboard


Would go straight to the wedding budget!

I’m going to give 10 random people who retweet this tweet $10,000 EACH! You must be following @Pulte and me so we can dm you if you win $10,000! Ends in 72 hours, will show proof ❤️



These blood centers are getting tricky. I can say no to 23 year old Brian on the phone and not think twice, but put a little old lady on the phone... I couldn’t hang up. Guess I’m donating blood next week.


I swear if I ever meet Anton in real life I will murder him. Thinks he’s so good at Mario cart. Prolly was playing sober too. Loser.


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