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Big raccoon fight in front of my building. It's officially spring in the 6ix!
Me: I'd like to pitch a TV show... CBC: We're not interested Me: It's about Anne of Green Gables CBC: We'll start filming Monday
Filing taxes feels like handing in a book report about a novel I didn't understand
Comedians that fake laugh really loud at the back of shows terrify me
Shoutout to all the crossing guards working at intersections with traffic lights. Don't let them win.
I'll never know the feeling of breastfeeding a hungry baby but I bet it's a lot like plugging in a phone on 1% battery
If you stand still on a sidewalk in Toronto they'll turn you into a condo
As long as knuckleball pitchers are still a thing, my MLB dream lives on.
It's like the whole country was having the greatest house party and then Shapiro showed up, took the booze and told the DJ to leave.
Saw a cashmere scarf for $550. Next to it was a cashmere sweater for $400. Gonna start a business making cashmere scarfs out of sweaters
As a suffering Toronto sports fan I used to to take solace in the fact that at least I didn't live in Cleveland. Now Cleveland's here.
Hey, I don't know if you believe in fate but I noticed your bumper sticker and I thought you should know, I'm also looking for the beef.
A good friend just sent me a sincere, heartfelt text. It really meant a lot. Gonna reply in a couple hours.
I clean my apartment before a flight so if the plane crashes whoever goes there is like, man he really had his shit together. What a shame.
United States Trends
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- 2. Lakers 40,5 B posts
- 3. Bama 35,7 B posts
- 4. Max Verstappen 121 B posts
- 5. Auburn 35,3 B posts
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- 7. Chuck Woolery 5.343 posts
- 8. #ViratKohli 36,6 B posts
- 9. Lando 40,8 B posts
- 10. Sainz 45,2 B posts
- 11. UCLA 10,7 B posts
- 12. #IPLAuction 33,1 B posts
- 13. Love Connection 5.189 posts
- 14. Ferrari 75,9 B posts
- 15. #Sundayfeeling N/A
- 16. #FROMily 1.672 posts
- 17. LAFC 3.749 posts
- 18. Nuggets 31,4 B posts
- 19. Jokic 21,4 B posts
- 20. Oklahoma 50,5 B posts
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