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@bong_sewerI'm like your grandma, except I'm hotter and less responsible she/her/hers
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shove a container of coconut oil in your ass for frizz-free hair and glowing skin
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italians don’t go to regular prison they go to a penne tentiary
ngl Stanley Tucci I have been better but appreciate this regardless
guy 1: There'll be parties for hosting guy 2: Marshmallows for toasting and caroling out in the snow guy 3 (has no idea what Christmas is): There'll be scary ghost stories and tales of the glories of Christmases long, long ago
"giddy up jingle horse, pick up your feet" sounds like something a homophobic gym teacher would say
Me, when Catherine Zeta-Jones comes on screen in Chicago
i will make January 6 look like an ice cream social
BREAKING: Effective January 20th, I will be BANNING all consumption of Diet Coke in the United States. It's time to Make America Healthy Again. #MAHA Who's with me?
ethel cain saying i love gay porn i think it is really hot to watch two dudes touch each other because i love men and only thing better than one man is two men when they’re touching and kissing each other that’s so fun yeah so i love gay porn uhm
so is there a Mrs. Guy Who Shot The UnitedHealthcare CEO or
Every day I wait for an email that says “you’re in BIG trouble and everyone is mad at you”
tell it to my heart is legendary, they could use that song every single season and i would genuinely not be mad at it
Which Drag Race lip-sync song choice will stay with you forever?
New via NBC — President Joe Biden has decided to issue a pardon for his son Hunter and is expected to announce it Sunday night, according to a senior White House official with direct knowledge of the decision.
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