gigi batuure
@abatuureplease don’t take me seriously. i can’t deal with that SNL/NBC scholarship
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If you can't handle me at my poorly mumbling Hamilton lyrics you don't deserve me at my flawlessly spitting down Hamilton tracks as crisp as @Lin_Manuel
mental health in the kinda shape that is simply going to RUIN my bank account on black friday
hospital sent scans before doctor has called with results. super excited to get my PhD from WebMD
My sister called me in the middle of the night and I asked if it was an emergency and she said nah so I went back to bed. Now why did I wake up to find this girl posting photos of her entire apartment on fire…?!!!
absolutely love korea. taxi driver just sighed deeply when heading to our hotel and said “when i see timothy chalamet i’ve gone too far” before sighing and making a uturn in front of his Chanel ad
You would not BELIEVE what I expect my weighted blanket and glass of lemon water to cure me of every day and night
i’m 0% worried about someone seeing my google history but if anyone saw the ads i get on instagram i’d probably have to drop dead
getting married to someone who’s a doctor so when my parents ask why i’m not a doctor i can tell them i got doctor at home
absolutely unhinged moment watching a man ask chat GPT how to draft a letter saying he wants to divorce his wife
the guy next to me on the flight didn’t get cutlery so i figured he wasn’t going to get food but he ordered the spaghetti and proceeded to eat the entire thing with his hands. a messy icon
i’m about to be so mf rich ty @taylorswift13 🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿
someone i know posted on ig they just spent $92k on a taylor swift ticket and now i know who’s house i’m robbing on May 28th 2023 at 6:30 pm
adulthood is a lot like frogger. i don’t mean that metaphorically like we just be dodging cars on the freeway some days
gaslighting my therapist by sipping lemon water, wearing a full face of makeup, and playing soothing bath sounds
you ever get a hospital bill back and it’s like damn it would’ve been cheaper if i had died
in the mood to make a nepo baby. anyone rich, famous, successful and well connected wanna marry me?
my dad has been begging to watch the “air excitement” movie all week. i’ve had no idea what he’s talking about. today i suggested we watch top gun maverick. when it ended with sheer delight he clapped and whispered under his breath “ahh yes! air excitement!”
my dad keeps calling timothee chalamet timothee chardonnay and i simply refuse to correct him
Hot guys who do comedy get to marry Scarlett Johansson and hot girls who do comedy (me) get to tell guys on bumble “haha no you should totally try an open mic if you’ve always wanted to”
Me calling God to make sure I ain't on his "Strongest Warriors" list again for 2023
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