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The only non-streaming service television I watch is the obscure sports station that came for free with my internet that automatically turns on after the tv has been idle for 90 minutes and its just like the national stone-skipping championships or acrobatic pizza dough spinning
Heard someone say “she’s so cool” as I left after work drinks and I fear I may never be the same
Vintage Hell’s Kitchen is dizzyingly good reality television An enraged Gordon Ramsey has such a masterful grasp of the English language, even more so in an era when you could insult anything about someone without fear
I hate when bar bathrooms have cryptic graphics to describe if it’s a men’s or women’s like please don’t make me think after 6 margaritas I’m scared
National Geographic needs to stop putting ozempic propaganda into my inbox please I just want to read about animals and ancient civilisations
Can’t wait to wear my custom Gwyneth Paltrow ski accident civil trial t-shirt on the slopes this week
Daylight savings is like would I prefer a slightly higher chance of being able to wear sunnies on the way to the office or would I like a slightly lower chance of developing depression
the Big Brother music makes me believe I could kick a door clean off its hinges
Love buying something online and then spending the next few days reading reviews about it to try keep the initial dopamine hit going until the thing actually arrives
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