@Yuyukastel Profile picture

nICOM@STER

@Yuyukastel

If life is a third rate anime, a dead character can be revived conveniently. But it isn't: Life is irreplaceable. -- [Hadena] on LoGH and @kudwafternoon

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but alas, that is today and it is done


hopefully the next episode on this account will not be me lamenting on my weaknesses as a human being but something more anime-related


i am a weak person and weak person should sleep good night


as someone who has done said terrible solutions, i know that possibility may return and it scares me


it is not that i am ganbaranai or hate learning; i am just afraid of any form of stress because i'm always on the verge of breaking down


i do think it's the winter climate dragging on and on but that hope is getting crushed; i really do not want to go to school this monday


ahh, maybe i should go to a psychiatrist or something; i want the world to stop at its tracks and do nothing for the rest of the year


for almost four months, i feel like the world can trample on me and i had honestly thought of terrible solutions to make it stop


granted, i have saved people from seizures before but something about this case just destroyed me; maybe because this happened in school


i find this beautiful irony despairing; instead of feeling heroic, all you remember is the eyes rolling back up to the head and foaming


i do think i'm becoming needier and more dependent on people; i've lost my sense of independence and confidence by saving someone


this relentless thought made me realize how small i am as a person; sure, i saved someone and am a hero but i feel sick remembering it


to save someone and then later finding yourself powerless because you could have done it better -- it's an awful feeling


sometimes, i wonder if i didn't help out the teacher and save this girl life would be different; i'd be a normal bystander


i have never felt i was 'myself' since the incident at Sep 28, 2012; it's like fate is trying to destroy my 3 year old hard work


i don't think i've felt this different after the incident where i saved someone from a seizure and got traumatized afterwards


if i was interested in the film medium, i would probably not complain but all i see is a worthless piece of junk wasting my precious time


i'm actually not asleep but i am stressed from having two projects and want to give up on them


she did say she would continue despite getting C&Ded; i'm bored~


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