Valerie
@Too_Sweet4_UJust another mother escaping reality one tweet at a time.
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I thought you’d be interested in supporting this Double Good fundraiser, s.dgpopup.com/58tj25qx . Thanks for taking a look!
Gavin Newsom has spent years dreaming of this moment. The moment where a chorus of Democrat voices would call on Biden to step out, and Newsom to step in. All has gone according to plan, except for one thing: No one wants anything to do with him. blog.electkevinkiley.com/mr-irrelevant/
Left Wing Vs Right Wing ‘F what your heard.. Both Wings are on the same Bird’ 💥
Welcome to your 40s.. falling asleep early means waking up in the middle of the night for no good reason.
Am I the smartest: no Am I the fastest: no But am I trying my best? probably not
Interviewer: where do you see yourself in 5 years. Me: still calling it Twitter.
Hello I’m 47, you might recognize me from such hits as why does my body hurt today and this gas station music slaps.
Three little birds just stopped by. Everything’s gonna be alright.
If it can't be fixed by a Costco hotdog, it can't be fixed.
A vibrator is your teammate fellas not your opponent, lawd
Adulting is turning on a movie so you can have a nice nap on the couch.
Welcome to adulthood: you’ll be trying to lose 5lbs for the rest of your life.
Cameron Diaz has a baby at 51 and I don’t have the energy to change a show I don’t like because the remote is too far away.
What if my soulmate says ‘warsh’ instead of ‘wash’.
Celebrate accordingly
My husband just told me that shopping at Aldi without bags isn't called freeballing and I should stop saying that
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