Jeff
@TheSonOfModPlastic Manc/Mod. Grumpy bastard. Pretty sure my real name is Chris, but I’ve given up trying to convince numerous colleagues that it’s not Jeff.
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Pretty sure Charlie keeps looking down at Shazam on his phone. #CoronationConcert
The UK is officially Pennyless. #RishiSunak #PennyMourdant #PrimeMinister
Definition of #Trussed (of a chicken or other bird) having had the wings and legs tied before cooking. "a trussed chicken ready to roast" Interesting…
Throwing people under buses, kicking cans down the road, sudden U-turns. There’s a certain poetry to the current car crash. #LizTrussPM #ToryShambles
Just logged in after a long day. Has this won the Mercury Prize? Social media is abuzz. And rightly so if you ask me. #QueenElizabeth
Judging by the sunglasses on show right now, I don’t reckon it’s been home yet. #WEURO2022
I wonder what exactly it was that George Ezra caught Prince Andrew doing in order to get on tonight’s line-up. #PlatinumPartyatthePalace
The Rams’ recent relegation from the Championship really seems to have cast a shadow over the #Jubilee for #Liz.
A friend has sent her son to school “wearing blue and yellow for #Ukraine” today. This is the chosen yellow element. Hmm.
Such a shame that we only ever get to hear the beautiful voice of Lyse Doucet during tragic world events. #Ukraine
Has anyone got the number for the RSPCG? I’m absolutely appalled that my neighbours continue to send their gnomes out for daily circuit training even in this biblical weather. They should be utterly ashamed. #StormEunice
I’m just relieved I caught up on Twitter before placing my order. I’m amazed Captain Tom’s daughter can still find the time to knit, what with running a successful PR agency and rinsing a nation. (She’s even modelled the angel on herself, the fucking charlatan.)
Does anyone else repeatedly mistake Judith Keppel for #Camilla, or is it just me? When #PrinceCharles becomes Head of State, I’m half expecting his wife to be appointed Egghead of State. #Queen
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