Jade 🇪🇺
@Skellibobs✈️ avid wanderer / 🎶 occasional gig goer / 🧚🏻♀️ professional tooth fairy / 💉lifetime member of the broken pancreas society
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Ridiculous scenes. Should have been cleared immediately, there was no need for Carlos and Lewis to end up with those punctures. Awful, awful management from the race director.
Just seen a new advent calendar for former public schoolboys. All the doors are already open for them.
Greg’s baldy News
He's going to have a GB News gig by the end of January, bookmark this tweet.
‘A show where Gregg Wallace, Huw Edwards, Phillip Schofield and Russell Brand are set adrift in the middle of the Pacific in a four man shark cage’
It’s amazing how many high profiles stories in this country take place in a Pizza Express
AND THEN you get there, having sold a kidney to buy a ticket, and the silly bastards around you talk through the whole show. Most expensive chats of their lives.
Keir Starmer will still be prime minister when Kemi Badenoch stands down as Tory leader.
Custard creams
I know we’re supposed to fear robots taking over, but this is cute AF 🥹
A little robot was caught on CCTV asking bigger robots: 'Are you working overtime?' The others said: 'I never get off work', to which the smaller robot replied: 'Come home with me' ⬇️ trib.al/OX9YPdD
After seeing how many people signed the petition, I was going to call a general election, then I suddenly remembered that you can go and fuck yourselves you dim-witted cry-babies. #LabourOut
Imagine being totally fine with everything the tories did for 14 years, then signing a petition demanding an election after a few months of a new govt because a few farmers have seen their arse.
Can we have a double eviction for Dean and Jane? Moaning pair of windbags 🥱 #IACGMOOH
Those who know any of the history of 1D and Zayn know how fucking monumental this is for him to get back on stage. And to do it just three days after…is unbelievable.
And we haven’t even scratched the surface yet 👹
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