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@SamOdamn

why be hot now when I can be a milf later tweets aren’t doing numbers like they used to so this is my ‘burner’ account until further notice #milfcity

Joined November 2012
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The way I used to post all my problems online and when it got out I’d be like “who’s the snitch??” Bitch me


Christopher Columbus after the Native Americans introduced him to popcorn and he gave them small pox #Thanksgiving


Once the lag cleared and the knee brace came into focus I knew it was over :/


Fuck it I’m downloading webkinz on the company laptop


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I think I'll miss science the most.


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sleepy joe you’ve got two months. go crazy. eliminate all student debt. legalize marijuana. make tampons and condoms free. ban cybertrucks. shit in the oval office’s air vent. kidnap barron. the world is your oyster buddy


If there are a majority of idiots in America then maybe Trump deserved to win. Ruler of the dumb dumbs


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I drank a large bowl of haterade last night


crawleth back into thy hole thou come from


Trash inspires trash


You think they poured all diddy’s baby oil down the sink


If Kendrick just accepted he’s a short king there would be no beef


I do indeed love a good red head


Twitter likes are private now leaving Venmo transactions to be the only stalking option left to man 😔


Liking regular flavored redbull at this point is just criminal


Employers be like “feel free to use the company snow plow so you can make it to work today!”


The roomie doesn’t think the earth is flat but is certain it isn’t round. Thoughts?


Me when I meet someone else whose iPhone still has a button on it


I’m really just frolicking around havin a good time


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