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Some people want to write a lot and does little like a hole in your pocket useless 👊
6 am: tired 9 am: tired 11 am: tired 3 pm: tired 5 pm: tired 7 pm: tired 9 pm: tired bed time: ENNNNEERRGGYY
my daily workout is getting up to close the door after my parents leave it open
Don't ask me to hang out at like 11pm, what do you think this is... I'm in bed, I've got no bra on, I already exfoliated. It's too late. ✋🏼
Things that make me happy: - You. - Lazy weekends. - Certain People. - Food. - Music. - Cute texts. - Concert tickets. - Summer. - You.
Pretending to die in front of your pet, to see if it tries to save you... mine never does :(
White people: "Hello, I would like to order..." Black people: "Yeah, let me get uhhh... Hold up! *Mumbles* What the fuck do I want?
Every mother on earth gave birth to a child. Except my mother, she gave bit to a legend. High five mom.
Your ex asking to be friends after a break up is like... Kidnappers asking you to "keep in touch" after letting you go.
Women know, they just know. And if they didn't, they'd still know. Men probably won't get this, but women will because they know.
Being nice to someone you dislike doesn't mean you're a fake. It means you are mature enough to tolerate your dislike towards them.
"I need to talk to you" is the one sentence that has the power to make you remember every bad thing you've ever done in your life.
I don't always talk to people with 'Swag' but when I do, I ask them for large fries
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