Phoebe
@PhelieberGawker described me as a nerdy non-sorority type. It must be true because it was on the internet.
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“@WIRED: Prepare to drop your jaw when you see this Orion nebula pic oak.ctx.ly/r/al99” damn nature, you beautiful!
Eels can travel over land when it rains. I'm never going outside again.
Thanks to Arrested Development I'm still not sure if maritime law is a real thing.
The Upper West Side: where the dogs are all really fun and the women are all really decidedly not.
The most important thing I learned in high school was how to pronounce "bourgeois".
I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings that time you had your roommate ask me to hookup with you while you were standing there and I laughed.
I'm alone and mixing potato salad and chicken salad, drinking a beer, and wearing an American flag body suit. Thanks George Washington.
I really hope this guy who gave me his copy of Harvard Magazine to hold doesn't forget it on his way out!
"Simultaneously aroused and jealous" the Germans must have a word for that.
Dog dander more deadly than cat dander. But both danders far less deadly than household air pollution resulting from stagnant aquariums.
She wears high heels / I wear sneakers / We're each expressing our gender identities in ways that make us feel comfortable / Date me
Tom Hardy's Bane accent is identical to his Heathcliff accent. Also his eyebrows are surprisingly thin.
The UES is all about children hailing cabs and white ladies being rude to black people.
Have you watched Clueless recently?? It is very important that you do.
Watching weight loss shows while making a triple recipe of custard. Had to go out for more heavy cream. #noregrets
Take my hand, and a cold one in your other. Let's walk through this holiday as free men and babes. Forever and ever. USA, you guys.
I spend my free time imagining that guy in the Black Eyed Peas meticulously styling his long hair.
Thanks NYPD, we're really excited for topless beach visits this summer.
![[RETIRED]](https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/3383187023/5f8ffc11777825ffc5303a620a7a0756.jpeg)
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