Phil-in-the-_______
@NashPhil75Just a cisgender, nerotypical, rando standing in front of a global social media platform, asking it to love him. (he/hymn)
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Reverse Engineers are such optimists. When life gives them lemonade, they make lemons.
Me: What does 2024 have in store for you? My friends:
I’m an @Oswald_Official fan and a banjo player. So this was one of my favorite gifts this year and will be prominently featured on my Christmas tree for years to come!
If a baker has red hair, does that make him a ginger bread man?
Electric cars sound like what I imagine flying saucers sound like.
Harrison Ford is my generation’s John Wayne. That’s it. That’s the tweet.
Considering their heads are hamburgers, I understand why they wanted to end the Hamburglar’s ghastly spree.
FUN FACT: The water in watermelon is melon water.
The angels after Jesus ascended (Acts 1:10-11):
Fred Armisen is one of Jim Henson’s funniest creations.
What I love about Jesus is that he is so down to earth.
Before we make small talk at the Super Bowl party, I’m gonna need you to watch #PokerFace .
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