@Muffin00510273 Profile picture

MuffRanger

@Muffin00510273

I’m just here so I don’t get fined

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MuffRanger Reposted

Stop putting your life on pause because you don't like the way you look 📣


MuffRanger Reposted

On April 8th, your plans are #cancelled. Because Woke returns for Season 2. #WokeonHulu


How we go from newborn to 0 month?? Then 1 month, 2 month etc. How is 0 even a clothing size? How is newborn before 0 mon? The fact that you are newly born means you ain’t 0 anymore! I don’t get it. #baby #newborn #babyclothes #idontgetit


Late night feeding thought: can someone explain baby clothes to me?


Traditional sex roles do a real number on us, don’t they?


Nothing like being naked in your own bed


I’m going to write a first child/parenting book that doesn’t assume the father/husband is completely useless. First of all. I am Head of Security, the Director of Sanitation AND the Head Chef in my household. However, we BOTH put in work in this relationship. Its 50/50!


I have champagne taste on a beer budget


MuffRanger Reposted

Mutual masturbation is one of the hottest things you can do with a sexual partner (trust me). Here's my guide to get into it. sexwithemily.com/your-guide-to-…


MuffRanger Reposted

We celebrate black history everyday my nigga.


Morning playtime, beer and bacon. In that exact order. 👌🏾👌🏾 #SelfCareSunday


I hate when you’re horny but too tired to self pleasure 😫😫😫 ah well. Maybe tomorrow morning 🤷🏾‍♂️


MuffRanger Reposted

It’s Twitter after Dark, right? I’m just gonna drop this off right here and go...

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Your kitchen/bar ain’t complete until you have 3-5 wine openers, and at least 4 bottle openers. But you only use one


MuffRanger Reposted

New post! In honor of Masturbation May, these are some sex positive affirmations that have helped me cope with internalized shame. mxedreviews.com/writing/sex-po…


MuffRanger Reposted

Insomnia who? Going hard this Masturbation Month is a must! #Wednesdayvibe

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I will for real kill the fries before attempting to kill a burger. Am I the only one??


MuffRanger Reposted

Start your week the right way 😉

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I’m not the only one that pretends to have a whole concert when listening to music by themselves right??


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