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The plan? Have JJ McCarthy miss on deep balls all season to convince OSU’s safeties to play tight so we can throw bombs over the top.
Let's check in on Michigan. Giles Jackson just housed the opening kick. @gilesjackson__ | @UMichFootball
Michigan folks making it hard for us to not root for ‘em. #GoBlue
me: guy in a frat: [shotguns a natty light in over 20 seconds] SατψRΔαγS αRΣ FΘΓ τηε βΩγS
the issue with nannying is you’re with young children so many hours a week you forget how to be a normal person. just asked my friend, a 23 year old woman, if she needed to “go potty before we leave”
me: i have so much homework and i have to study for finals and-- anybody: are you free today me: yeah
goodnight to everyone except the person that says “you’re turning really red” as you’re turning red in a public setting
*me during a test* "alright focus, you got this" my brain:
The year is 2009. You’re a senior in high school and you’re about to graduate and go to college. You’re not worried about paying tuition because a local businessman promised you and your classmates tuition ten years ago. You are a Scott’s Tot. Life’s good.
Your mcm took 60mg of adderall and drank an entire 32oz can of Monster just to study for his Intro to Biology final that’s tomorrow morning. He’s in the library right now sweating profusely and writing the definition of “nucleus” on a flashcard. He needs a 118% to pass the class
Sleepovers in 2007: slept on a pull out couch with 4 blankets & 12 pillows. You wake up to pancakes & waffles. Sleepovers in 2017: sleep on a crusty futon. No blanket. You used your jacket at a blanket. Slept with your contacts in. Wake up hung over & broke
If your college doesn't feel like home you're at the wrong one...
Person: where r u from? Me: Chicago Them: ChicaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaago?
This kid and I bumped into each other & we said "ope" at the same time & after 7 secs of eye contact he just says "Portillos" and walks away
I love carbs but they don’t love me back. Relationship goals, am I right?
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