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"Woke up in the kitchen sayin how the Hell did this shit happen, oh baby." -me, quoting Beyonce to a pizza box the morning after
I've attempted to get out of bed 10 different times this mornin
Most people spend their time trying to find someone to sleep with instead of finding someone worth waking up to...
I hope the light at the end of the tunnel is a computer screen
In alcohol's defense, i've done some pretty dumb sht while completely sober too.
Just because it's in a coffee cup doesn't mean it's coffee
Apparently alcohol contains female hormones. After you drink enough you can't drive or shut the fuck up
they ask 18 year olds to make huge decisions about their career & financial future, when a month ago they had to ask to go to the bathroom
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