Berf
@BerfBased$BERF - Sloth. 36. Single. Trolling & making frens in Mom's Basement - https://t.co/YaGwknU8cS | Not Based? #GetBerfed CA: 0xFC5462143A3178CF044E97C491F6bCb5e38f173E
From the seven seas to the islands of BASE, $BERF has turned his basement banishment into a full-blown pirate saga. Low on rations, but high on vibes with zero sense of direction, he sets sail with one mission: to find a Big Booty Latina and reclaim his throne.
It wasn’t supposed to end up like this. $BERF used to be on the guest list—until his last party stunt, which involved a keg stand, a fire extinguisher, and a speech about “diamond hands” at 3 a.m. Now, banned but unbothered, he’s crashing the party anyway.
$BERF's been feeling extra bullish this week… fully embracing his inner moonbrain and refusing to cash out a single coin. But with bills piling up and his wallet running on fumes, he had to get creative. So he robbed a bank and called it “protecting his investment strategy.”
$BERF didn’t want to claim all the credit for the bull market, Trump winning, or that mysterious pump at 3 a.m., but quietly, behind the scenes, when no one was watching, he made the final move that set it all in motion. Thank him later. Right now, he’s got a bull to ride.
$BERF wick found jeeters in lobby talking smack and something inside him snapped. Channeling his inner sloth, he stormed in—eyes bloodshot, clutching candle sticks, and mumbling something about "BASE loyalty." In one swift move he put the jeeters out of their misery.
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