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I got 100 dollars for anyone that will jump my front neighbor. ASAP
“That edible ain’t shit” *stands up* Me:
These all the people we leaving behind in 2023 👋🏾✌🏾🖕🏾🤷🏽♀️🤦🏾♀️😂‼️😒😭😭🥴 Everyone
Pound town just left pound town
y’all: who’s the bitch who’s pussy is tighter than a U turn with no power steering fluid?? me:
Like damn she in her MOOD 🤭‼️😂
This is where I met some of the funniest people in my life 😂 hope they’re doing good
Omg the Chinese Spy Balloon is trying to see who’s in my bedroom 😭
me in the Ticketmaster queue making sure no bots get Beyoncé tickets
Me In Traffic: “DRIVE BITCH” The Bitch 😩:
absolutely nobody: Chrishean:
mind u Mario is supposed to sound like this
Chris Pratt’s Mario voice has been revealed.
Ozzy Osbourne says he's "fed up" w/American insanity & gun violence, will move back to UK from L.A, saying "I don't want to die here." Congratulations, America. You've become too nasty & dangerous for the Prince of Darkness.
Lottery official confirms that Mega Millions ticket sold in Illinois is the sole winner of the estimated $1.28B jackpot.. the winner will walk away with about $700,000,000 after taxes.
To any and all “news” outlets who use that false account as a source, you know better. Stop using it for the benefit of your slow news day please and thank you. And to the person relentlessly pretending to be Mason, ultra ultra ultra creepy.
I couldn’t be in that room because I would’ve been like
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