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Dirt Man 🦬

@AlbanianGoku

Man of the people

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Me on the bottom making the correct argument while showing off my cool tricks at the same time


Dirt Man 🦬 Reposted

DRAYMOND DO IT AGAIN

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Gonna take advantage of the free speech on this platform to say people who voted for trump in 2024 should be stripped of their rights and herded like pigs


What being on bumble will do to a man

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Why I'm voting for Kamala Harris.



Dirt Man 🦬 Reposted

I'm not remotely exaggerating when I say that I watch this five or six times every time it crosses my feed. I've come to consider it a beautiful piece of art; it reveals something true about the world, and withstands many different interpretations. I call it "Lions in Winter."


The key to McDonald's success is that their food is very hamburger coded

i think the reason why 1D had such a huge success is bc they were so girlhood coded, idk if this makes sense but like the boys didn’t show an ounce of toxic masculinity, they were physically affectionate with eachother, not scared to share their emotions and also were proud that+



Dirt Man 🦬 Reposted

*losing at mtg* whatever dude i clear u at interpersonal skills


This is the honestly the first good feature to come to an app since like 2012

Taco Bell app has a feature now where you can tell them how much you want to spend and it gives you a random combo of items. If you don’t like the combo, you can refresh and it’ll give you a different combo



Me when I know how human beings communicate with and perceive each other: I bet he has no conversation subjects

be that guy

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Dirt Man 🦬 Reposted

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night


Hilarious that this could happen to you and then think well I need to post about this on my libertarian meme page and not draw any kind of connection there

Had to take my wife to the ER (nothing serious, she needed an IV). We got a bill saying we owed 17 GRAND for essentially hooking her up to a saline IV and a doctor speaking to us 5 mins. We said we needed a cash price and they came back to us with a cost of 3 grand. How does…



The American right has adopted a bold new strategy of lying and then admitting they were lying the next day

In the last several weeks, my office has received many inquiries from actual residents of Springfield who've said their neighbors' pets or local wildlife were abducted by Haitian migrants. It's possible, of course, that all of these rumors will turn out to be false. Do you know…



I thought ijbol was one of those communist abbreviations like JDPON I thought the stan twitter girlies were getting into Maoism


In the club experiencing emotions they don't have words for in the English language


Dirt Man 🦬 Reposted
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Only opinion on Dr. Doom is that if he was real I'd be liking the semi-ironic Latverian regime apologia that came up on my timeline


Before you post any tweet it's important to check to make sure it doesn't undermine the unifying forces of brotherhood and camaraderie in the cosmic war over the soul of man


Dave Portnoy chooses who to support by comparing the average skin tone of each team and picking the lighter option every time

I want to be very clear. I am rooting for France to beat the USA in the gold medal basketball game. My allegiences are far stronger to @jaytatum0 than dodo brain Steve Kerr and Bron Bron. 🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷



Yeah I'm sure that's it and it's not just that a clip from a comedy show isn't as funny as it was 8 years ago

theres a 4chan post about how super intelligent characters on TV shows often make no sense, because its usually a normal writer imagining what its like to be super intelligent, which is impossible likewise this type of comedy is normal people imagining what its like to be weird



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