@rofllrastogi Profile picture

rofl_rastogi

@rofllrastogi

stand up comedy ...

Joined June 2019
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My love life is so dead I should call it a fossil now.


Me trying to send an ice breaker to my crush. Me: Happy children's day 🫠


"Taste mai best mummy aur Everest" My mind is ruined af!


Dear @snitchindia , I ordered something from your website and the order is delivered to the wrong address and there is no support from your side. Tried contacting over WhatsApp support but no conclusion. Kindly look into this


If you think u are a bad luck, just know I once donated blood to a patient and he died.


Need new friends, puraane vaalo ki shaadi hogyi.


हद ए मोहबत्त इस कदर पार करदी अब उसे पाने की चाहत नहीं उसके सवर जाने की चाहत है। उसके साथ रहने की इच्छा नहीं उसे खुश देखने में ही राहत है


It's funny how we seek love our whole life but when we get it we just reject it.


एक काश मेरी जिंदगी का ये भी है की मैं तेरे हर काश में होता।


Every jacket is a bomber jacket if a Pakistani guy wears it.


एक खुश्क का लिहाप ओड रखा है मेरे मौसम ने सुनो जब तुम आओ तो संग सावन ले आना।


Ask her some meaningful questions to lead the conversation. Meanwhile me: naankhatai khaai hai tumne kabhi?


Me: "mere husn k alawa kabhi Dil bhi maang lo na" She: Abe chamkadar k chamkeele chuttad "husn" hai bhi tere pas?


She: kaisi lag rhi hu? Me: "एक हसीन ख्वाब जैसी"


I see buildings everywhere but I am looking for a home.


If God is not giving you something because he is protecting you from that.


"crush" someone you can only see and admire Example:

Tweet Image 1

Are you doing things that will make you happy? Is it really making you happy?


I am so much anti orgasam mere wet wipes bhi dry hogye.


तू समझ न मैं यूं ही तो घबराया नही हू, और कहती हो पास आकर बैठो, अब तुझे कैसे बताऊं मैं परसो से नहाया नही हूं


Apni crush k liye ladka dhoondh rha hu I guess I am bicholiazoned.


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