@andr3wsky Profile picture

Andr3w

@andr3wsky

KCMO https://t.co/tWoVYbKINM

Joined December 2021
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Can’t believe we just let Hamlet get away with having a name like that. Dude’s named like he’s a character in Babe, Pig in the City and we let it slide? Gonna order the Hamlet at Denny’s. Bacon sounding mf. We could roast him, bet he’d smell delicious


Call it a rebellious streak but nobody - and I mean nobody - tells me what to do. Unless you’re, like, dressed up as a sexy nun or teacher or fire marshal or something like that. Then it’s fine.


I think the biggest misconception people have about me is they believe that because I DISH it I can TAKE it. I cannot. I will cry. Privately, yes, but I will cry.


Just finished up Arcane aka bi panic: ✨the show✨. I can say it’s v good and you know it’s good because I was actually tempted to play League of Legends for a moment


👏🏼normalize👏🏼elective👏🏼comas👏🏼 I haven’t felt well rested since 2009 😩


Do a favor for someone and people really be like “I don’t know how to thank you for this…” bitch I have every mobile payment app ever made


Every time I go to Chipotle I ask them to put the cheese directly on the meat/rice so it melts. I do this because I am the change I want to see in the world


You have to understand: people aren’t born petty. Being petty is a choice. And I choose it every day.


I wonder how many ninjas in history had to quit ninjaing when they realized that the real person they were hiding from… was themselves


maybe if we forego the $36,000 LG OLEDs we could pay teachers more but idk


This holiday season remember: if you hear “ho ho ho” that’s Santa and you’re safe. But if you hear “YO ho ho”, that’s a pirate and you should run. Knowing the difference could save your life.


Just ate a pizza so good it made me want to talk to the manager. If this is middle age, get me the hell out of here


8 months later and I still stand by this with all my heart all my soul all my everything


hello is there where I go to complain


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