Patrick Langan
@PLangan77Hey, I'm just glad to be here. I don't deserve any of it.
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My daughter is on the couch grunting as she pretends to have a baby. This is definitely new territory for me!
Finally, the proof I have been searching for! Adding this to pre-marital counseling curriculum ASAP!
Why is it so difficult to find masculine thank you cards? Men need to say thank you some more... create some demand!
Why does every Steak and Shake in the world set their inside temperature to Arctic levels? I suddenly have no desire for ice cream!
Cool...I am in for a long life!
I have hope in the future of our world... that someday we will make health food that looks and tastes exactly like a whopper with cheese.
Noah insisted on watching the Star Wars prequels with me. Reliving these abominations is sooo painful...why George... Why?
my daughter: "Daddy did you know a toot is a fart and I TOOTED A BIG FART?!" ...logically sound...delightfully real. #daddyslittleprincess
Stephen King + local play land artist = Ronald of my nightmares.
RT for a chance to win. 1 box has a golden razor & ticket to #RogueOne's world premiere #GilletteSweepstakes Rules: bit.ly/2fVrhkX
Ok, I'm no music lover so I may be missing something... Do people actually listen to this guy who is playing the Cowboys halftime show?
What I learned driving home with Todd and Falyn: penguins are degenerates.
Things I can't do without coffee: 123. Carry a tray and wave. (Sorry lake Williamson staff). #coffeehelps
Why am I still getting email invitations from the (NFL) Rams? We broke up... You left... Leave me alone! #badbreakups
Horrific bellowing scream in our neighborhood a few minutes ago. Woke up my kids. Scared the dog. Turns out it was Greg cussing that homer.
That awkward moment when you are in the middle of a meeting and a giant bug flys right down your throat!
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