Maggie Dyson
@DysonMaggiesleepy girl with big dreams
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“Who’s considering you while your considering everybody else?” - My Therapist
Direct deposit: 1400 Me at SeaWorld: how much for their freedom
Birth certificates have gotta be the most pointless documents. Why do I have to prove that I was born? I’m literally right here.
Girls don't want boys. They want the covid vaccine and a nice apartment
asked my 5-year-old what she wanted for dinner and she said “not a burned quesadilla” bc in the summer of 2019 I overcooked one side of her quesadilla
If I was Sam and Carly suggested we name our joint web series “iCarly” I’d body slam her into another dimension
Anybody who worked (IN PERSON) throughout the pandemic needs to be making at least $25/ hour
DAY 305 OF THE PANDEMIC LET’S HEAR IT FOR DAY 305
He said some of us have a JOB
the horse has now officially left the hospital
Obama just KNOW he got the baddest wife at the function. A true flex. 😭
How to treat Covid at home ... this was shared on a Covid survivor group... HOW TO FIGHT COVID AT HOME No one ever talks about how to fight Covid at home. I came down with Covid in November. I went to the hospital, running a fever of 103, a rapid heart beat, and other common....
“WhAt’S iN tHe VaCcInE” bitch you literally don’t know what’s in Tylenol shut up
Remember this when your mayor tells you they can’t create more housing or provide safer shelter for people experiencing housing insecurity and homelessness
Outdoor dining has gradually escalated into what might reasonably be called a buildings.
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